The Principal of the Donadoni Academy has enjoyed immense amounts of family time. And Wally time. And to have the Academy free from the strain of multiple humans streaming other humans through computers and walking around like virtual zombies rushing to their next glitch filled google meetings and the zoomy zones of gloom has been refreshing. And every school administrator that has had a moment to reflect on the manic madness was surely grateful for the break. And so, as I performed my dead man’s roll out of bed to head to the head and relieve myself I had no idea what dangers lurked in the hallowed halls of our homey abode.

The Academy has been on a nice vacation schedule and the midnight voyage seemed to be a routine trip, no need to wear glasses (they don’t really help in the dark when you see out of half of one eye to begin with), no need to think anything could possibly go wrong. The children were sleeping all snug in their beds with visions of more video games dancing in their heads and the Principal’s assistant and Wally were snoring peacefully.

So I gingerly made my way through a few doorways and took the familiar left turn at the refrigerator so I could bang a quick right after the usual 8 more steps to the bathroom door. After washing and drying my hands I was still in my sleepy haze and happy to have avoided any bumps or bruises in the dark. Maybe the light of the full moon would be my good luck guide back to safety.

It’s a good thing my feet were cold and I was wearing socks. Or maybe it would have been better to feel the squish of the dog’s disturbingly misplaced doo doo biscuits that were thoughtfully laid out on the floor right outside of my office…I mean bathroom door. But let’s just say that as I slipped across the kitchen floor and hurtled towards a nearly fatal head butt from the microwave I was completely stupefied. I had no idea what caused me to slip so severely and quickly. It’s a good thing the custodians do an amazing job keeping the floors clean so that I could narrow down the causes.

Of course when I looked down at my soiled sock and sniffed the suddenly nauseating air I realized the banana peel that I stepped on was not a banana peel. Banana peels smell better. But I digress.

Let’s just say that as the Academy finishes up their holiday break and things get back to the normal we call normal now, I hope that the turkey trash stealing, and doggy doo accidents will be a thing of the past, something to leave in 2020. Hope springs eternal. So, I will continue to row my boat onwards and upwards and make sure I check the floor when I head to the head. Who knew how slippery some things can be on a well cleaned floor?

It was just a good reminder that nothing can be taken for granted. Not even routine midnight self-maintenance. Perhaps that will be the key for 2021- look out for #1,, but don’t step in #2.

Thanks for Coming and Watch your Step!